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El Mucho Post Whoro
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I'm bumping my music and waiting at the light
to head into work at a late hour tonight,
when I turn my head left, and what do I see?
A big sleigh pulled by eight reindeer right next to me.

The fat man in red shook his head at my tunes,
Cranked up his alpine and his subwoofers went boom,
I guess he didn't approve of my funky rap beat,
So he blasted his jingle bells all down the street,

I couldn't believe that this punk was just hatin',
All jolly and fat like he ate ten pounds of bacon,
So I said to myself I'll teach him a lesson,
And told myself I was glad that these mods weren't R-weapon.

Hit a switch and heard my remote bottle opener go,
That Zex kit from mom piped to my motor would blow,
The minute I stepped all up on that gas,
There's no way that jolly fat man could ever even pass.

I rolled down the window and purged in blitzen's face,
And said 'Yo fatboy, do you wanna race?'
All that punk did was smile at me and nod,
And when he flipped a switch too, I thought that it was odd

I revved up my motor, that crankshaft just spinning
And I knew that soon it would be me that was winning,
And just when I thought it would end this short trip,
Fat boy leaned over and said 'Wanna race for pink slips?'

I nodded and smiled cuz I knew I would win,
I got 300 horse, he got a reindeer and 7 kin,
But when that light turned I was in for a surprise,
When two jet engines launched him past me, I couldn't believe my eyes.

So as I sit on this corner car-less and tell you my story,
I want you to listen and I want you to worry,
Just because you got some nitrous to spray,
Doesn't mean Saint Nick don't have Jet Engines to play.

:)
 

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Originally posted by: NorCalCoug
I wrote it on the fly. :shrug: Call it christmas-eve/morning at work boredom. :)
:bowdown: HILLARIOUS!! :rofl:
 
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